Sunday, March 6, 2011

Delayed By The Cloud

OK, this blog was supposed to post several days ago, but I was in internet H E Double Hockey Sticks so it’s just posting now.  If you think some of these topics are dated, meet me in the alley behind the In-N-Out in Hollywood at 10PM sharp and we’ll settle this.  Bring Yahtzee.  Punk.
As always, see more of me including TV appearances, acting reel, comedy promo videos, schedule and more on my website at
... a joke is a joke is a joke, of course ...
A new law in New York says it’s illegal to have a dog tied up for more than three hours.  However, the law is vague about any time limit if she’s hot.
A new study found that a small nuclear war could reverse the effects of global warming.  Dear President Obama: Libya. Two birds, one stone: Hint, hint.
Thirteen Mexican troops have been arrested and charged with transporting drugs.  The most shocking part of the story is that they only managed to catch THIRTEEN of them.
The internet went dark in Libya yesterday, but traffic at porn sites was stable.  Like we always do, American men stepped in to pick up the slack and keep the world economy going.
Charlie Sheen has apparently said “Tiger Blood” one too many times; last night Elin Nordegren showed up and hit him in the head with a nine iron.
A new study says that teens and young adults are having less sex than they did a decade ago.  Experts say this could be tied to another recent study that said teens and young adults are fatter than a decade ago.
Scientists say that a study using deep-water cameras has revealed how and where tiny ocean animals called Krill have sex.  The study also reveals that scientists need to get a girlfriend.  
Orange County, California announced the participants in the Festival Of Whales this week.  Executives at Dancing With The Stars are threatening a lawsuit, claiming they already have a signed contract with Kirstie Alley.
63% of all web videos no longer require flash.  However, 88% of all viewed web videos involve flashing of some kind.
Wait a minute: I thought the middle east didn’t want democracy?
A 500-foot Ferris wheel, which would be the tallest in the Western Hemisphere, may be built on the Las Vegas strip.  Newly released ads on trucks in the city promise that by calling a 1-800 number, you can go “once around” for $500.
A recent U.S. News And World Report article tried to help people decide what kind of mortgage to obtain.  Here’s a thought: How about going for the one you can afford?

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