Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Gene Autry And George Bailey

I'm back in the saddle again
Out where a friend is a friend
Where the longhorn cattle feed
On the lowly gypsum weed
Back in the saddle again
Just a quickie to get back in the swing of things. (That’s what SHE said!)
As always, see more of me including TV appearances, promo video and schedule at www.starspangledcomedy.com.
Almost thirty robots have started teaching English to kids in South Korean schools.  Sadly, the robots were programmed by American public school graduates, so their English is freaking horrible.  OR So the South Korean kids will never know the difference between to, too, and two; your and you’re, or lose and loose.
A Miami attorney said she was kept from visiting her client in prison because the underwire of her bra set off the metal detector, and the guards asked her to remove it.  She became suspicious when they then said she had too much “schmergenflietensinc” in her panties and asked her to remove those as well.
WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange says he's writing an autobiography.  Here’s hoping TMZ leaks a copy beforehand and kills it’s sales.
Pat Robertson said the war on marijuana possession is costly for the nation and damaging to young people, but a spokesman said he was not calling for decriminalizing pot.  Robertson instead wants to counsel those young people.  Especially the eighteen year old girls ... that are stoned ... so come over right away ... and bring some pot.  OR  Rather, he was calling for the criminalization of young people.
A review has found that more than 2.3 million Americans reentered the country this year without a passport or any other official documents.  However most of them were white, so no one said anything.
The Governor of Hawaii wants to release more information about President Barack Obama's birth and dispel conspiracy theories that he was born elsewhere.  Reportedly LeBron James is in talks to release the info on an incredibly self-centered ESPN special.
Baby Boomers are nearing retirement age with their plans in jeopardy.  As they’ve done their entire lives, the Boomers will take to the street, write slogans on signs, and whine until someone else does their work for them.  Peace love dope!!!!
Terrelle Pryor and four other Ohio State football players apologized for selling memorabilia and other transgressions.  They rationalized that they only did it to pass the time all day, since none of them ever went to class.

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